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Second Wife

Fourth Letter to Tahira

No, my dear girl, not like this. Sabira underwent the same thing that happened to that princess who was unpacking the magic needles. Do you remember that story or have you forgotten it? As a child you used to love hearing that story. You used to hear those stories to go off to sleep, whereas now I want to tell you the same stories to wake you up. They are the same stories except that their purpose has been changed. This does not happen particularly to you; even great nations undergo the same process. During their period of downfall, nations listen to the anecdotes of their past to be able to sleep (The sleep of death). And for awakened nations, the same stories wake them up to a new life. How a story affects, depends more on the listener rather than the story itself.

Story of the Princess

As far as I remember, the story of the Princess was like this. One day she found in her garden a prince charming, lying quite still and unconscious. The whole of his body had been pierced with pins. This scene frightened the Princess. She was about to run away screaming when she heard a voice from somewhere, beckoning her not to feel afraid. The Prince was under a magic spell, the voice told her. These needles could be removed from the body, one per day. When the last needle would come off, the Prince would open his eyes and he will marry the first woman he sets his eyes on. The Princess felt better and she started taking out those needles, one everyday. It took her days, months, even years. But the Princess, unmindful of everything in the world, kept on taking off those needles. Her advancing years were a source of apprehension for her parents and well-wishers. They were all accusing her of running after a mirage. But she would not listen to anyone, shunning all the luxuries of the world. She was following her craze of the Prince and his needles. She kept working on it for twelve years. Now there were only a few needles left-eight, six, four, two and then one. When the last needle was left, the Princess's happiness knew no bounds. Her whole world was awakening. She was imagining how the Prince would wake up smiling and how they would get married; how her dream of twelve years would come true. She thought she should don her bridal dress before she takes out the last needle. So she busied herself in getting ready. She had a maid who knew everything. The minute the Princess turned her back, the maid guiltily took off the last needle. The removal of the last needle made the Prince wake up smiling, and thanking the maid a thousand times for his release, he took her away to get married. When the Princess came back after having her bath and changing, she found the Prince missing. She could not bear this shock and lost her mind. That maid became the Princess and the mad Princess started gleaning the cities and jungles for her Prince.

This was the story that your Grandma used to tell to you before you went to sleep. And after hearing this story you used to remark angrily, "If I could get hold of that maid, I will tie her to a tree and beat her black and blue until she releases the Prince to the Princess!"

Zaidi and Sabira

My daughter, the same thing happened to Sabira. Zaidi and Sabira were brought up in the same home. Zaidi lost his father in his childhood, and his father's brother accepted this orphan as his child. Sabira and Zaidi grew up together. Girls in general are more sensitive and delicate compared to boys, but Sabira in particular was more understanding and gentle. When she came to know that Zaidi was an orphan, she felt more sympathetic towards him. She would display her feelings by saving whatever fruit or sweet she got and giving it to him quietly on his return from school. In the same manner whatever monetary gifts she would receive on Eid, she would give them to Zaidi. In childhood the motive for her innocent sympathies was that Zaidi did not have a father. Perhaps because of these sympathetic gestures, or may be due to some unconscious sentiments, even Zaidi, in his heart, kept on becoming closer to Sabira. Until one day when he matriculated he whispered to his aunt, his wish of getting married to Sabira. Everybody in the family opposed this proposal tooth and nail, including Sabira's mother. Zaidi's widowed mother was very much in favour of this match but her poverty and widowhood were blocking her way. She could not dare mention such a proposal. This friction remained in a family for sometime, and Sabira remained silent. One day while talking to a neighbour, it slipped from Sabira's mother, "How could she marry her daughter to a person who had been brought up on their charity?" When Sabira heard this, she could not contain herself and breaking the ice, she told her mother that it was no good that she hated an orphan. "God ordains us to respect them. Now come what may, I am going to marry this poor orphan".

Zaidi always used to say, that the best day in his life was when Sabira asserted her will in front of her mother. Therefore, they got married.

Sabira's Thriftiness

Sabira was a thrifty girl. In fact a clerk lives from hand to mouth. Over and above themselves, it was his family of two brothers, a sister and a widowed mother to be procured for and a loan of his father to be paid. But Sabira managing the house so efficiently that nobody could guess that they were so poor. This management included quite a bit of sacrifice on the part of Sabira in favour of her husband and his family. Whenever she had some free time she used to collect some sewing orders from the neighbourhood, which used to supplement her income. Sabira had to work very hard but she was happy to see her husband happy and the thought of being able to look after and fully support a poor and needy family used to make her feel good.

Zaidi was quite contented, but for a wish that he could get, better education. When Sabira noticed her husband's chagrin, she started encouraging him. She first suggested that after office hours, he join some evening classes in a college. But to do this Zaidi had to give up that tuition which he was giving for the last one year to earn twenty-five rupees. This idea was blocking Zaidi's way. Sabira solved this problem by herself teaching three neighbouring children in the evening for thirty rupees per month. Gradually Zaidi obtained his BA degree. After this he wanted to do his LLB degree to become a lawyer. For this he had to give up his job because in those days, there were no evening classes for law.

Sacrifice and Hard-work

This stage was very difficult (in fact it was rather impossible). But Sabira told Zaidi not to worry. "If this is what you intend to do then leave your job. I shall start teaching children during the day and work harder with my sewing. You continue your law education. I will look after myself and procure for your education too." So Zaidi joined Law College and Sabira surprised the world by putting her words into action and did exactly what she said she would do. She used to be so busy that on some days, she would only get three or four hours of sleep. She was working hard constantly, even with her little daughter in her lap. She had a lovely innocent little girl.

Sabira constantly kept taking the needles off her 'Prince'. When Zaidi cleared his LLB, Sabira thought her ordeal would be over, too. She would have some respite. Working so hard for day and night had taken its toll on Sabira's health. But she did not care much for it. She was happy that her husband's wish had been fulfilled. (And perhaps the subconscious feeling that she was fulfilling all the deprivations, which Zaidi had suffered because he was an orphan.)

Sabira could see that contentment still eluded Zaidi. There was something, which still troubled him. She tried asking him many times but Zaidi brushed her inquiries away. At last one day, upon her insistence, Zaidi told her what he had been wishing since his childhood, that he would go abroad and become a barrister. He would then be a big leader. People would come to listen to his speeches and would take him out in processions. They would be cheering him heartily. "Then I would become a member of the assembly and later a minister. But all these wishes seemed to be destined to remain buried in my heart. I am not worried for my mother since she is living with the younger brother. I am worried on your account only. If you could fend for yourself, then I could go abroad for my higher education. But there seems to be no way out of this predicament". Sabira listened to all this very carefully, but did not reply. After two or three days she said to Zaidi, "I have done some deliberation over this problem. Do not worry on my account. I can fend for myself and our daughter. You go ahead. May God fulfil your intentions; and it would be my pleasure to see your efforts bear fruit. The biggest hurdle is the fare to go abroad. Make my jewellery your stepping stone; and there is nothing else to worry about".

Zaidi was stunned to hear this. His eyes were moist and he could not speak. He hugged Sabira and cried. When after a while he could control his emotions, he could only stammer and say, "Sabira, you are an angel from heaven and not a woman. You should be adored. I did not deserve you. There is nobody on this earth luckier than I am who has got a wife like you. Whatever I am feeling, I do not know how to express it. Sabira, you really deserve all the adoration. All your life has been one of constant love and sacrifice and I feel so ashamed that I have not been able to do much for you. Rather I have been the cause of so much worry and discomfort to you. This was quite naive on my part to be wishing to go abroad. I know you'll have to undergo a lot of inconvenience for it. I do not want to trouble you any more. I give up the idea of going abroad. This is no justice that I would have all my wishes fulfilled and you undergo a life of constant worry. No Sabira, I cannot do that".

Zaidi wanted to say something more but Sabira cut him short by saying that if husband and wife, too, started thinking in terms of "you and me", then where else would one get cordial relationship? "You were the one to tell me that Nikah literally means this kind of relationship, like sleep in the eyes. Therefore, why do you differentiate between discomfort and happiness between husband and wife? Fulfilling all your wishes is my pleasure. This is my decision that you must go abroad. Or rather let us say now it is my wish, which is necessary for you to fulfil".

Meanwhile she heard the baby cry and Sabira went to her.

A few days passed arguing about the issue. Zaidi would say he would not go and Sabira would insist that he should, until the day arrived when Sabira went to the station to see Zaidi off. He was crying already; when he picked up his daughter in his arms he started sobbing violently. Now Sabira, too, could not control herself and her cheeks were wet with warm tears. The train left and Sabira did not have even the fare money so that she could reach her parents' home. Zaidi noted all that in an article in a magazine published abroad. The heading of that article was "Unbelievable".

Sabira went to a friend of hers, Parveen, to borrow some money so that she could reach her parents' place. Parveen after hearing everything smiled and casually said: "You should have gone along with Zaidi abroad yourself. Never trust these men. If he brought a Ma'am from abroad then what would you do"?

Parveen said all that casually and in a joking manner but Sabira felt like strangling her friend, she felt so bad. She controlled herself with difficulty and just said, "Parveen, you do not know how much you have insulted me by saying this. You did not understand whom were you talking about? You could not understand Nahid's father. You do not know how far above ordinary men he is? You do not know what he is? Parveen, come what may he would not look at another woman in the whole world"? Parveen felt sorry for having hurt her friend.

Trials of Sabira

Sabira went to her father's house. He was a poor man and lived in a small town where Sabira could not get any children to teach or any tailoring assignments either. She was surrounded by misfortune but she was not discouraged by them. Her hard work and intelligence came to her rescue and she kept fending for herself and for her daughter. Sometimes she was even able to send some gift to Zaidi. This hard work told upon her health, but if all this had any compensation, then that was her daughter's smiles and her husband's loving and thankful letters. So when she used to lie down at night, tired, she would hug her daughter and would start thinking of the easy life ahead. She would count the days after which Zaidi would come back; then she used to weave her web of happiness and would imagine how heavenly how heavenly it would be when he would come back. She would be able to gather all the happiness in the world along with her husband and daughter. There would be songs of joy on her lips. Her eyes used to get moist with such happy thoughts, and then would go off to sleep, enclosing her tears of joy within her eye-lids as a pearl does in its chamber under the waves of the ocean, forgetting all the trials and tribulations of life.

Sabira kept on taking out the needles from her 'prince's body until just a few were left. As these needles kept on becoming less and less, they brought back the freshness on Sabira's face. Now there were a few months left for Zaidi's return. But Sabira felt that just a she was becoming more enthusiastic about his coming back, his letters had become devoid of love and more mechanical, and their frequency became less than before. It had been a constant link before and she, due to her preoccupation, had to excuse herself for not replying sooner, Now it was the other way round. Sabira had to complain for not getting a reply to all her letters. The 'needles' were becoming less and less, but Sabira's heart had been pounding quicker than before. She could not understand the reason for this change. Sometimes she would have apprehensive and eerie ideas, but then she would brush them off as superstitions. She would ask Zaidi about the date of his coming back but he would beat about the bush; and the estimated date of return passed and Zaidi did not come. Now Sabira became tongue-tied. Many weeks passed. It had been so many days since she had heard from Zaidi. One day Sabira was sitting quietly, thinking about this, when the postman called. Sabira eagerly went to the front door and took the letter. It was of foreign mail. She opened it hurriedly only to find a newspaper cutting inside the envelope. It was a photograph of Zaidi, along with a young girl, and the caption read, "This newly married couple is proceeding to Switzerland for their honeymoon." Sabira staggered and fell down. When she opened her eyes, she was in a hospital. The doctor motioned the nurse to show her Nahid. Sabira patted her daughter's head and said in a stammer, "My dear, I still have to live for you". And she fainted again.

After a few days the hard-boiled Sabira came home. She did not write anything to Zaidi. Neither did he write any letter. However, Sabira's old father wrote a letter to Zaidi. In reply to that he wrote back: "I do not know what crime I have committed to deserve this dressing down which I am getting. When religious law allows it, then who are you to be objecting to it? I care for Sabira more than you. I am responsible for them morally and religiously. I am not a mean person that I shall be evading my responsibilities. I am a gentleman and I intend fulfilling my obligations like a gentleman. Sabira can live wherever she feels happy. Her happiness would be my happiness. I will keep on sending her maintenance. If she wants to follow another path for her life, even then I would not be a stumbling block. I have already said that her happiness makes me happy, too." When Sabira's father replied this letter, Zaidi's next letter contained a divorce for Sabira.

Dear Tahira, take heart and wipe off your tears and read the whole letter. Look at me. How do I start relating these stories to you, with a heavy heart? Either do not ask me to tell you such harrowing stories, or if you do ask, then have a heart to be able to listen to such tales of woe.

Now Mr. Salahudin Ahmed Zaidi, Bar-at-Law, is leading a gilt edged life. A palace to live in; a car; servants; separate servant and nurses for the Madam; Nanny for children. He has attained a high status in modern society because both husband and wife are quite social. They are known in the clubs. Newspapers take a note of them, too. Now he is thinking of becoming a leader. Since it is easier to become a leader through religion, Mr. Zaidi is advising the nation to become "true and real Muslims". He delivers emotional speeches about Islam. He writes lengthy articles in which he tries to depict the true picture of Islam. He is about to become a leader, and you know that a Ministry is two steps away.

Sabira's Condition

He is leading this kind of posh life and poor Sabira, on the other hand, is marking time on her life in her parents' home. Nobody has ever heard her talk about this topic. But we have heard that when Nahid pesters her for a story at night, then she relates the story of the prince with needles, whereupon Nahid goes off to sleep. But Sabira keeps on laughing her crazy laughter. Sometimes she automatically utters words such as "Religious law", "morality" "gentle manliness", "responsibility", and then laughs out so loudly that it sometimes wakes up the people at home. Then her old father comes and says only this, "Dear Sabira, take heart. You said you would live for Nahid. This brings Sabira to tears, tears that are wiped by Mary's cloak, and then Sabira goes off to sleep.

Who is the Culprit?

I agree with you Tahira. Here Zaidi is not the only culprit. The bigger culprit is our society which not only recognizes such culprits, but gives them a high status. Whereas these people should not be allowed to come near decent people. The humanitarian level is far too high, but if viewed from even a very mundane level, it would be quite clear that if, for his ordinary wishes, a person can betray a wife like Sabira, could he be trusted in other matters? But our society is at fault. If our society could focus on the correct angle, then these type of wolves in lambs clothing could be chastised in no time.

But Tahira, I want you to attend to another aspect. Leave alone Zaidi and the society. What would you say about that the woman who knowingly destroyed a home? She knew everything, still she destroyed a member of her own sex. If only she would have cared a little bit, Zaidi could not indulge in such an annoying act in humanity. Whereas our society is raising Zaidi on a high pedestal, our women of high society are (in whose predicament you remain so gloomy) accepting Mrs. Zaidi like a sacred idol. What do you think of them?

Therefore, my daughter, everything here is chaotic; and women all riding the same boat. Thank Goodness, Saleem came back safely, otherwise if he, too, would have quoted the 'religious laws', saying that the Shariat permits it. Then what could I or you have done? This dagger is not only on people going abroad, here, too, it keeps on dangling. Which area can boast of not having a house dismantled this way? Which lane does not hear the sobs and sighs of people like Sabira? These sighs could belong to those who have been divorced or those who had to put up with the usurpers. My dear daughter, I keep on praying for you (and for daughters like you), for the stability of your marriage. May you and your children and your grand children prosper. May you be happy and may your homes be safe from any kind of disintegration. I cannot do anything more than praying, although I know that such chaotic society cannot be set right with prayers or good wishes only. Its remedy could only be effected if it could be re-constructed on purely Quranic lines.

God be with you

Parwez
April 1954