| Islamic Way of Living |
by Dr. Sayed Abdul Wadud
(1) GREETINGS - ASSALAMO ALAIKUM
It is customary among all nations of the world, that when two persons meet they greet each other.
There are different ways of greeting. Hindus when they meet each other, utter the words (ىﮔ بند)"Bandgi" which means " I am your slave". They also meet with folded hands or touching the feet of elders which shows, " I am lower than the dust under your feet. Englishmen when the meat each other say "good morning" or "good evening" which means I wish a happy morning (or evening) for you.
MUSLIM GREETINGS -- On the other hand, Muslims says (السلام عليكم) when they meet each other. One utters "ASSALMO ALAIKUM" and the other responds by saying "WA ALAIKUM-US-SALAM". The words mean " May you be in perfect peace", or "May you get proper nourishment (of your personality)": or "if you need my help any time, I am at your service. Thus the word (السلام عليكم) expresses the very object of Islam and is a noble and satisfying expression of mutual goodwill and cooperation. That is why the Quran Says:
Wa-itha huyyeetum bitahiyyatin fahayyoo bi-ahsana minha aw ruddooha (4/86)
"When a (courteous) greeting is offered to you, meet it with a greeting still more courteous, or (at least) of equal courtesy."
GREETING TO YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS -- This greeting is not limited to the people whom you meet outside, but you also must greet your family members when you enter your house:
Fa-itha dakhaltum buyootan fasallimoo AAala anfusikum tahiyyatan min AAindi Allahi mubarakatan tayyibatan (24/61)
"But when you enter houses, salute each other -- a greeting of blessing and sweatness from Allah."
(2) DECENT BEHAVIOUR
Allah cooands () "Ihsan" in society. "Ihsan" means beauty and proportion. In a thing that is proportionate, all its constituents are just appropriate, neither more, nor less; and where there is proportion, there is beauty; where as a thing that is disproportionate looks ugly. A Muslim is one who maintains proportion in his own self and also in his dealings with other people. Thus "Ihsan" means a condition where an individual (inspite of his best efforts) lags behind, his deficiency is made good by others, to restore the disturbed proportion of the society. For example, a person who has become weak on account of illness or old age and is thus unable to fulfil his wants, to make good his deficiency is "Ihsan". According to the Quran a Muslim is one who does "Ihsan":
Wabialwalidayni ihsanan wabithee alqurba waalyatama waalmasakeeni waaljari thee alqurba waaljari aljunubi waalssahibi bialjanbi waibni alssabeeli wama malakat aymanukum (4/36)
"And do "Ihsan" to parents, kinsfolk, orphans and those in need, neighbours who are near (relatives) neighbours who are strangers, the companions by your side; the wayfarer (you meet) and those serving under you." (4/36)
It means a Muslim is one who does "Ihsan" to all whom he comes in to contact.
As regards "Ihsan", there is a point worth remembering -- it is an everyday experience that when somebody helps a need person, he begins to think that person to be his subservient and expects the recipient to act according to his whims and wishes. If at any time he does not act according to his liking, he is labelled as "Ihsan Faramosh", the one who is forgetful of "Ihsan". This is entirely against the teachings of the Quran. The Quran says that you help a needy person because it is your duty to do so. That person remains no more under obligation to you. Even such an idea should not come across your mind. The Quran says that you should help a need person with the expectation:
La nureedu minkum jazaan wala shukooran (76/9)
"No reward do we desire from you, nor thanks."
(3) COOPERATION
Nobody is able to accomplish all his affairs single-handed. Off and on, one needs help of his fellow beings. This act of mutual help is called () "T'aawan" or cooperation. But the question arises whether one should render help to everybody he comes across or only to a certain type of people? For example, on usurps the rights of another person. Shall we help the wrong doer or the one who is wronged? It is apparent that we should help the latter. The holly Quran has laid down the principle:
WataAAawanoo AAala albirri waalttaqwa wala taAAawanoo AAala al-ithmi waalAAudwani (5/2)
"You cooperate with one another in matters of (ِبرّ) broadmindedness and (تقوى) matters consistent with the Divine laws and do not cooperate in matters of (اثم) sin and (عدوان) enmity."
The word (ِبرّ) above means matters of righteousness and broadmindedness and (تقوى) means to live a life in consistence with the Divine laws and injunctions ordained by Allah. The word (اثم) is used for a camel who gets tired or remains behind the herd. Thus any act which retard the human progress is called (اثم). The word (عدوان) means 'Rebellion' i.e. to act against the Divine laws and whose acts are more and more useful for humanity and do not help those who rebel against the Divine laws and whose actions serve as an obstacle to human progress. In other words help others in matters declared to be good by the Quran but not in matters declared to be bad therein.
(4) MUTUAL CONSULTATION
Mutual consultation is described by the Holy Quran as a specific act of Muslims:
Waamruhum shoora baynahum (42/38)
"Who conduct their affairs by mutual consultation."
The Holy Quran ordains that of every affair you come across, you must get a thorough knowledge of it:
Wala taqfu ma laysa laka bihi Aailmun (17/36)
"And pursue not that of which you have no knowledge."
And before reaching a decision you must consult those who know more about it, so that all aspects of a matter become clearer to you. But such consultation does not include matters of sin and enmity (58:9). It is limited to matters that are useful to humanity and are consistent with the principles laid down in the Quran.
CONTACT WITH OTHERS -- It is apparent that mutual consultation is possible only if one behaves politely with others. That is why it is said:
Wala tusaAAAAir khaddaka lilnnasi (31/8)
"And turn not your cheek in scorn towards people."
(5) FULFIL OBLIGATIONS
It is highly important that when you make a promise with somebody it must be fulfilled at all costs:
Waawfoo bialAAahdi inna alAAahda kana mas-oolan (17/36)
"And fulfil every engagement for (every) engagement shall be equired into."
CONTRACT -- Similarly when you make a contract with other nations you fulfil it:
Awfoo bialAAuqoodi (5/1)
"O You who believe! Fulfil (all) obligations."
Human affairs run smoothly if individuals as well as nations are faithful to one another. Otherwise there shall be utter confusion all around. Therefore all promises and all contacts must be fulfilled. But one must keep in mind that this fulfilling of obligations should not remain confined only to big matters. This also applies to small every-day affairs. A promise id a promise whether it concerns a big matter of small. For example, if you tell somebody, "I shall come to see you at 4 P.M. ", you must keep to it strictly. On the other hand if you are not able to do so for some unavoidable reason, you must inform the person concerned about it.
(6) LOAN
In human life occasions do arise when one falls short of something or of the money with which to buy that thing and is no in a position to fulfil his wants on his own. On such occasion he needs help from his fellow beings. This help can be rendered in two ways (1) one who possesses the required article or surplus money with him may hand it over to the needy without any demand for return. This is by way of 'Ihsan' as described earlier, (2) Or one may give the required article or the amount with a promise for return. This is called loan and it must always be brought into writing. The Quran says:
Itha tadayantum bidaynin ila ajalin musamman faoktuboohu (2/282)
"O you who believe! When you deal with each other, in transactions involving future obligations in a fixed period of time, reduce them to writing."
PLEDGE - - But if an occasion arises that you do not find a scribe to turn the loan into writing, in such a security deposit:
Wa-in kuntum AAala safarin walam tajidoo katiban farihanun maqboodatun (2/283)
"And when you are on a journey and cannot find a scribe, a pledge with possession (will serve the purpose)."
PROMISE FOR RETURN -- A promise made for the return of loan must be fulfilled. But if the debtor is involved in a difficult position as regards repayment, in such a case, make things easy for him:
Wa-in kana thoo AAusratin fanathiratun ila maysaratin waan tasaddaqoo khayrun lakum (2/280)
"If the debtor is in a difficulty, grant him time till it is easy for him to repay. But if you remit the loan as a gift, that is the best for you."
USURY -- But do not get back a single pie more than what you had paid to the debtor. This profiteering is termed as usury (ربو) and it has been strictly forbidden by the Quran:
Waahalla Allahu albayAAa waharrama alrriba (2/275)
"But Allah has permitted trade and forbidden usury."
On the other hand, any earnings from the security deposit by the debtor also comes under the heading 'Riba'.
(7) TRADE
As stated earlier Allah has permitted trade and forbidden usury. What is Trade- To well something to somebody in lieu of money is called Trade. Both buying as well as selling come under it. The question arises as to how much profit one should get in a bargain. In this the holy Quran has laid down the principle:
Amanoo la ta/kuloo amwalakum baynakum bialbatili illa an takoona tijaratan AAan taradin minkum (4/29)
"Eat not up your property among yourselves in vanities by let there be amongst you trade by mutual good will."
Thus the profit must be settled amongst the parties. The right way to do it is that the price of every article should be labelled over it and the rate of profit be fixed up by the government. If it has not been done so, then the profit should be settled between the purchaser and the shopkeeper by mutual good will. Nor the seller should ever think of exploiting the purchaser, nor the purchaser should try to usurp the genuine profit of the seller. That is trade by mutual good will. A profit that exceeds the measure is disallowed by the Quran:
Waan laysa lil-insani illa ma saAAa (53/39)
"That man can have nothing but what he strives for."
WEIGHTS AND MEASURES -- For this the holy Quran has said:
Waawfoo alkayla itha kiltum wazinoo bialqistasi almustaqeemi (17/35)
"Give full measure when you measure and weigh with a balance that is straight."
So that everybody should get what is due to him without any obstacle.
(8) JUSTICE
You might have come across a camel or an ass, carrying load. If the load is equal on both sides, the goods shall remain safe and is shall be easy for the animal to carry. This is justice, which means a load neither tilted to one side nor to the other but just balanced. Thus a decision in which neither one party gets favour nor the other party is deprived of what is due to him is called (عدل) justice. The Quran attaches great importance to it.
IAAdiloo huwa aqrabu lilttaqwa (5/8)
"Do justice because by so doing you act according to the Divine laws."
JUSTICE TO ENEMY -- The Quran ordains to do justice not only in a neutral atmosphere but even to do justice to those who are your enemies:
Wala yajrimannakum shanaanu qawmin AAala alla taAAdiloo iAAdiloo huwa aqrabu lilttaqwa (5/8)
"Let not the hatred of others make you swerve from doing justice. You must do justice. That is nearer to the path Allah leads to."
Note:- 'Adl' not only means justice in a court of law but it is also incumbent on Muslims to do justice in every day affairs.
(9) TRUST
A thing or property which is entrusted to somebody for a particular period is called (امانت) or Trust. The ownership of the thing entrusted remains with the original owner. Thus when the owner wants to get back the thing entrusted, it must be returned without any obstacle:
Inna Allaha ya/murukum an tu-addoo al-amanati ila ahliha (4/58)
"Verily Allah commands you to render back the trusts to whom they are due."
The Trust is not only confined to a material object or money; if, on the other hand, a man tells something in confidence to another man, that also is a Trust, because here on person depended on the other because he considered him to be reliable. (But one must be careful that the thing told is no one of malpractice or mal-intention.)
RESPONSIBILITY -- Similarly a work that is entrusted to you by another person is also a (امانت)Trust, which must be fulfilled. The trustee may be a Prime Minister or a peon, he must fulfil his responsibility faithfully.
NATIONAL TRUST -- A Trust may be an ordinary deposit. On the other hand the reins of power being the biggest and the most sacred trust that human beings can entrust to their fellow beings, it is imperative that those who are given power must be most trustworthy and most fit persons, those who are capable of deciding the human affairs with full justice and can thus fulfil the responsibilities laid upon them.
On the other hand, it also implies that to entrust reins of power to undeserving persons means betraying the national trust: and thus the verse:
Inna Allaha ya/murukum an tu-addoo al-amanati ila ahliha (4/58)
"Allah commands you to render back the trusts to those whom they are due."
Also applies to this wrongful act.
Note:- It is a common practice that a person tells you something.. against some body, for further communication; but at the same time asks you to make sure that his name is not disclosed in this connection. It is a bad practice. Tell him that you will not cooperate with him in this matter and that when he says something against somebody, he must have the courage to say it openly; and that this very thing that he wishes to keep his name secret means he is telling lies.
(10) EVIDENCE
DO NOT HIDE TESTIMONY -- A certain matter can be decided justly only if a person who know anything about it comes forward and truthfully describes its details. This is called Evidence or Testimony. ( Testimony means statement made under oath). The holy Quran has strictly ordained to give a true statement:
Wala taktumoo alshshahadata (2/283)
"Conceal not evidence."
JUST STATEMENT --
Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo koonoo qawwameena bialqisti shuhadaa lillahi (4/135)
"O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as withness to Allah."
It means that you should not come as a witness to some party but as a withness to Allah. State firmly, openly and exactly, what you have seen, neither more nor less, nor in favour of somebody, nor against some body.
Walaw AAala anfusikum awi alwalidayni waal-aqrabeena in yakun ghaniyyan aw faqeeran faAllahu awla bihima (4/135)
"(Stick to justice) even if your statement goes against yourself, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor, for Allah can best protect both."
Fala tattabiAAoo alhawa an taAAdiloo (4/135)
"Follow not the lusts (of your hearts) lest you swerve."
It means that you should never say things which are intriguing and have got double meaning. If you do such a thing, you can hide it from the people around you but not from Allah, as he knows, everything.
Wa-in talwoo aw tuAAridoo fa-inna Allaha kana bima taAAmaloona khabeeran (4/135)
"And if you distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well acquainted with all that you do."
The Holy Quran thus lays great stress on a just statement. But it by no means follow that you should disclose facts only when you are called upon to do so, by a court of justice; but you should state all that you know, truly and fearlessly, even for matters outside the court.
FALSE STATEMENT -- Never give false statement. A prominent aspect of the believers is:
Waallatheena la yashhadoona alzzoora (25/72)
"(They are) those who witness no falsehood."
(11) BRIBERY
As stated earlier, it is a bad thing to acquire wealth by unfair means but the worst form of ill gotten wealth is Bribery. It kills justice and usurps other people's rights. It does wrong to innocent persons and forms the basis of a wrongful society. The Quran says :
Wala ta/kuloo amwalakum baynakum bialbatili watudloo biha ila alhukkami lita/kuloo fareeqan min amwali alnnasi bial-ithmi (2/188)
"Do not eat up your property amongst yourselves with vanity. Nor use it as bait for judges with the intent that you may devour wrongfully and knowingly other people's property."
Thus Quran not only prohibits taking bribery but also prohibits offering bribery. A complainant should file a suit of law only to get his right, a withness should give a true statement and the judge should dispense full justice. The Question of offering or accepting bribery does not arise. One who does so is a criminal in an Islamic Social Order.
(12) SOCIAL ETIQUETTE
PERMISSION BEFORE ENTERING HOUSES BELONGING TO OTHER PEOPLE --
Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo la tadkhuloo buyootan ghayra buyootikum hatta tasta/nisoo watusallimoo AAala ahliha (24/27)
"O you who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until you have asked permission and saluted those in them."
And if permission is not obtainable:
Fa-in lam tajidoo feeha ahadan fala tadkhulooha hatta yu/thana lakum wa-in qeela lakumu irjiAAoo fairjiAAoo huwa azka lakum (24/28)
" And if you find nobody in the house, still enter not until permission is given to you: if you are asked to go back, go back, for it is a matter of purity for you."
On the other hand in such houses which are not residential and where you keep some articles of use e.g., a godown, you are not required to seek permission:
Laysa AAalaykum junahun an tadkhuloo buyootan ghayra maskoonatin feeha mataAAun lakum waAllahu yaAAlamu ma tubdoona wama taktumoona (24/29)
"It is no fault on your part to enter houses not used for living or which serve some other purpose for you, and Allah has knowledge of what you reveal and what you conceal."
It means that if, for example, the godown in which you enter is a common one and you are all alone while entering, an idea of being dishonest should never come to your mind.
ASSEMBLY ETIQUETTE --
Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo itha qeela lakum tafassahoo fee almajalisi faifsahoo yafsahi Allahu lakum wa-itha qeela onshuzoo faonshuzoo (58/11)
"O you who believe! When you are told to make room in the assemblies (spread out and) make room: (ample) room will Allah provide for you. And when you are told to rise up, rise up."
INDECENT ACTIVITIES -- are prohibited while sitting in an assembly. People of Lot committed such indecent acts. Lot said to his people:
Wata/toona fee nadeekumu almunkara (29/29)
"And you practice wickedness (even) in you councils"?
PERMISSION TO LEAVE-- Believers when they get together on a matter that requires collective action, do not leave the place of their gathering unless they are permitted to do so:
Lam yathhaboo hatta yasta/thinoohu (24/62)
"They do not depart until the have asked for leave."
In short, the etiquette required, while attending an assembly, is to sit in a manner that you make room for others, commit no indecent act, do not indulge in an unworthy talk and when the assembly is dispersed, you rise up and depart. When you are sent for, for a particular business, do no leave unless permitted.
INVITATION ON A MEAL--
Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo la tadkhuloo buyoota alnnabiyyi illa an yu/thana lakum ila taAAamin ghayra nathireena inahu walakin itha duAAeetum faodkhuloo fa-itha taAAimtum faintashiroo wala musta/niseena lihadeethin (33/53)
"O you who believe! Enter not the houses of the Nabi unless you are invited on a meal, (do not go so early as) to wait for its preparation. When you are invited, enter (at the appointed time) and disperse when your meal ends. Linger not for conversation."
Although these may be considered as small matters, yet it is important to observe them, so as to create an atmosphere of pleasant mutual relationship, displaying beauty and discipline.
(13) MISCELLANEOUS MATTERS
ENVY -- Do not envy those who hold a better position than yourself. For example, if a man is more learned and brilliant than yourself, or a person who earns more than yourself by putting in more labour and has better living standard, or the one whose children are kept more clean and tidy, you do not grudge against him but work hard so that you may also reach the same standard. To envy others is not an Islamic way of living.
Am yahsudoona alnnasa AAala ma atahumu Allahu min fadlihi (4/53)
"O do they envy mankind for what Allah has given them of His bounty."
BACK BITE -- Back biting is prohibited; which means do not say anything in somebody's absence, which you would not like to say in his presence. In the words of the Holy Quran it is like eating the flesh of the dead body of your brother:
Ayuhibbu ahadukum an ya/kula lahma akheehi maytan fakarihtumoohu (49/12)
"Would anybody like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, you would abhor it. (Then how would you like to backbite people in their absence).
SPYING --
Wala tajassasoo (49/12)
" Do not try to explore each other's secrets."
NICK NAMES --
Wala tanabazoo bial-alqabi (49/11)
"Do not call others by nick-names."
Wala talmizoo anfusakum (49/11)
"Nor find faults t defame one another."
DO NOT BROADCAST EVIL -- If you are in the know of somebody's defects, do not try to broadcast it with a view to defame him. However, if a person has committed excess against you, you may seek its remedy in some more, appropriate manner:
La yuhibbu Allahu aljahra bialssoo-i mina alqawli illa man thulima (4/148)
" Allah loves not that evil should be noised abroad in public speech, except where injustice have been done."
RIDICULE -- Do not ridicule others with a view to defame them:
Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo la yaskhar qawmun min qawmin (49/11)
"O you who believe! Let not some men among you ridicule others: it may be that the (latter) are better than the (former)."
SLANDER --
Inna allatheena yarmoona almuhsanati alghafilati almu/minati luAAinoo fee alddunya waal-akhirati walahum AAathabun Aaatheemun (24/23)
"Those who slander chaste, indiscreet believing women, are cursed in this life and in the hereafter."
This verse points out that virtuous women are sometimes indiscreet because of they think of no evil. But even such innocent indiscretion lands them in difficulty because of the slanders spread out about them. These women are never aware of an impure act, nor an evil idea ever occurs to them. People who spread such slanders about them are guilt of the gravest offence.
SUSPICION -- Do not suspect anybody unless you know for certain that he has committed wrong. Keep a good opinion about him and change it only when you get some concrete evidence about his bad act.
Ya ayyuha allatheena amanoo ijtaniboo katheeran mina alththanni … (49/12)
" O you who believe! Avoid suspicion as much as possible."
RIDICULE OF DIVINE LAWS -- Do not hold the laws of Allah in light esteem. If a thing is not clear to you already try to understand it carefully. If you are sitting in an assembly where such ridiculous talk about the Deen of Allah is going on and it is beyond you the check it up you should depart from that assembly and go there only after they have stopped it and have become engaged in other affairs.
Itha samiAAtum ayati Allahi yukfaru biha wayustahzao biha fala taqAAudoo maAAahum hatta yakhoodoo fee hadeethin ghayrihi innakum ithan mithluhum (4/140)
"When you hear the signs of Allah held in defiance and ridicule, you are not to sit with them, unless they turn to a different theme; if you did, you would be like them.
At yet at another place it is said:
Wathari allatheena ittakhathoo deenahum laAAiban…(6/70)
"Leave alone those who take their 'Deen' to be a mere play or amusement."
VAIN AND CROOKED DISCUSSION -- Do not indulge in vain and crooked discussion. Present your arguments intelligently, hear the opposite with a cool mind and answer gently:
OdAAu ila sabeeli rabbika bialhikmati waalmawAAithati alhasanati wajadilhum biallatee hiya ahsanu (16/125)
"Invite (all) to the ways of your Rabb with wisdom and beautiful preaching and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious."
If you realise that your point of view is wrong, admit forthwith and be not adamant. About believers, Quran says:
Walam yusirroo AAala ma faAAaloo wahum yaAAlamoona (3/135)
"And (they) are never obstinate in persisting knowingly (the wrong) they have done."
ANGER -- Man often commits such acts in anger, of which he feels ashamed afterwards. Thus one should keep himself under control in such a situation. Allah loves such persons:
Waalkathimeena alghaytha waalAAafeena AAani alnnasi (3/134)
" Who sublimate anger and pardon (all) men."
Note: The usual translation of the words (كاظمين الغيظ) is " who restrains anger". This is not correct. The Quran instead of suppression or restraint of anger, ordains sublimation of anger, which means to transmute the energy generated by anger in to some nobler or useful activity.
PARDON -- But the person who deserves pardon is the one who commits a certain bad deed unknowingly and then feels ashamed of it afterwards:
Annahu man AAamila minkum soo-an bijahalatin thumma taba min baAAdihi waaslaha faannahu ghafoorun raheemun (6/54)
"And if any of you did evil in ignorance and thereafter repented and (amended) his conduct, Allah forgives his (and thus you should also forgive him)".
But a person who persistently causes trouble to his fellow beings and does not stop committing excess, inspite of its having been brought to his notice, such a person must receive punishment:
Wajazao sayyi-atin sayyi-atun mithluha (42/40)
"The recompense of an injury is an injury equal thereto in degree."
Because
Innahu la yuhibbu alththalimeena
"Allah loves not those who commit excess."
Note:- The punishment of an offence shall be given by court of law. One should not take the law into his own hand.
(14) SELF REFORM
SELF REFORM -- It is a usual occurrence that one person instructs another, to be good, not to tell lies and not to do bad deeds etc., but at the same time he himself continues doing what he asks others not to do. It is a bad thing according to the Quran:
Ata/muroona alnnasa bialbirri watansawna anfusakum (2/44)
"Do you enjoin right conduct on the people and forget (to practice it) yourself."
Thus primarily one should concentrate on Self-Reform. Do yourself first, of what you ask others to do. The Holy Quran says:
Lima taqooloona ma la tafAAaloona (61/2)
" Why do you say that which you do not."
REFORM OF FELLOW BEINGS -- After self-reform it becomes incumbent upon you to reform those with whom you come in contact in life. These may be your family members or your business partners, or friends or acquaintances:
Qoo anfusakum waahleekum naran (66/6)
"Save yourself and your families from fire."
But as stated earlier, the best way to reform others, is present them your own model. But in matters of self reform one should never think that his personality has reached perfection and needs no further reform, That is wrong. God only knows how far your personality has developed:
Fala tuzakkoo anfusakum huwa aAAlamu bimani ittaqa (53/32)
"Therefore ascribe not to your personality a perfect development. He (Allah) knows best how far you have worked in consonance with the Divine laws."
PAY ATTENTION TO A GOOD ADVICE -- Often it so happens that if a certain person advises another person that he should leave so and so of his bad acts, the latter at once retorts that the former should first mend his own ways and leave so and so of his bad deeds. This is not the right attitude. If the former also does something bad he shall have to bear its consequences. The latter should only see If the advice given to him is correct or not. If it is correct he must follow the advice because that shall be for his own benefit. Any bad act on the part of one who advises shall not affect the one who is advised. However, the one who advises another person, must first of all consider if the vices that are visible to him in another person are not present in his own self. If everybody in a society follows that principle, the whole society shall become righteous.
Thus, make it a point that you should first mend your own self, then advise those nearer to you, followed by a similar good advice to others. When anybody draws your attention to a certain thing, you, must look to it whether he tells a right thing or a wrong thing. If what he says is right, you must take care to attend to your vices rather than telling the adviser that he is also bad and that you would not listen to him.
HYPOCRISY -- According to the Holy Quran, the worst crime is hypocrisy. Who are the hypocrites:
Yaqooloona bi-afwahihim ma laysa fee quloobihim (3/166)
"Those who said with their lips what was not in their hearts."
A (مومن) believer is one who openly declares what is in his heart. A (كافر) non-believer is one who does not believe in the Truth, as well as opposes it openly. He does not deceive others.
But a hypocrite is one who believes differently from what he says and thus deceives others:
YukhadiAAoona Allaha waallatheena amanoo (2/9)
"Who think they deceive Allah and those who believe."
They act merely for outward show:
Yuraoona alnnasa (4/142)
"They do things only to be seen by others."
That is why hypocrisy is a crime worse than disbelief, according to the Holy Quran:
Inna almunafiqeena fee alddarki al-asfali mina alnnari (4/145)
"The hypocrites will be in the lowest depths of the fire."
The Quran says that these people, have got a diseased heart:
Fee quloobihim maradun (2/10)
"In their hearts is a disease."
A disease that is progressive:
Fazadahumu Allahu maradan (2/10)
"And Allah has increased their disease."
The only remedy to check this disease is that such persons should openly turn to repentance and feel ashamed of their deceiving trait, followed by mending himself with a determined mind and thus keeping to right path.